The shop is on a quarterly tax plan. Meaning every three months, I fill out a form for the State of Kentucky and pay what I owe. This is enlightening in many ways. I keep books, but hadn't paid real attention to how much we actually made. For the last three months, we were living on less than $75 a month. That is how much we had for food for five plus pets, gas and mortgage. We find ourselves in a frustrating loop. We must have the shop to make a living, but we can barely live. The shop has picked up in business, but it is too late.
Our planning was bad. We put trust in people that we shouldn't have. We lost the Neophyte Homestead on promises, we are unable to find second jobs, though we have applied as far away as Huntington, WV. Now we face even more consequences.
I have failed. I apologize, but it is the truth. We are unable to survive here. (Financially)
I don't know what we do from here. But this blog is on hiatus until further notice. There are years upon years of knowledge, mistakes, recipes and how-tos if you look around.
When we decide what happens, I will let you know. Right now I am in mourning, and not the best person to be around. I put on my big girl panties every morning to deal with the world. My blog is where I find solace, it has always been cathartic. But lately it has felt like I have had to hide some things that have been happening. That to open up as I have done in the past will bring about even more trouble, criticisms, and backlash.
There are so many things I wish to share, not just to vent, but to remember when I finally am subdued by the brain damage and forget, so my boys know what truly went on when I can no longer recall, and so we can learn through my mistakes as I have always put forth.
I know exactly what we did wrong, we didn't fully do our research, we didn't plan the move correctly, and we moved too soon. We allowed our excitement and love for the land to override logic.
We tried. We tried our damnedest to make this work. We are drowning, and there is no life guard on duty.
I am asking for nothing. It gets exhausting being accused of trying to get things out of people every time I have bad news to share. Yet another reason I no longer feel comfortable sharing as much as I once did. Your good thoughts, positive vibes, well wishes and prayers do us a world of good.