Raspberry colored hair attracts Japanese Beetles. "Is Phelan having a seizure in the middle of her garden?"
If a bug flies up your nose resist the urge to go after it if your hands are covered in mud.
Hot Dogs taste better when cooked over a campfire, rotating in a chicken basket.
Never ignore the pig
Never trust a cow, as soon as you turn your back they will goose you, lick you, or shove you. And I am certain they also gossip about you.
I know they laugh at you.