We have done well so far with in season game. However I didn't have a garden last year, and have run out of vegetables. I have some canned goods left, mainly sauces, ketchups, refried beans and the like. But no chickens. I worry that if I make too much food, what happens if we don't have a customer and I can't buy more groceries? We just went two weeks without a client. The stress was becoming a bit overwhelming. Up to that point we were getting enough work to have food and pay the shop bills. But there was always that voice warning me.
My boys can eat. They can hold there own against the big boys. Large is slightly over 6'2" now (still growing) and the others are rapidly catching up. I on the other hand am done growing, and fluffy enough that skipping meals or eating less won't hurt my figure. I do love me some breads. So my mind justifies it.
Sometimes I hesitate about posting things I have written. I had no such qualm about yesterday's. I saw it nothing more than the truth. I wasn't asking for help or pity, I was just telling you. Thank you for the loving lectures, I appreciate them. I am not alone though in the mom skipping meals department. And this isn't my first rodeo. Life happens, we make choices that are emotionally appealing at the time. My tummy may rumble but my heart is content. I would sacrifice the world for my clan. As long as they are clean, healthy and have happy bellies, then I feel better.
Some days I feel guilty for dragging my family out here. So skipping meals may be a pittance that I am subconsciously indulging in. I have to shrug my shoulders on that one. I am not sure. It's that little voice of worry that gets to me.
But as I pointed out yesterday, spring is at our door steps. Not only does this mean more work at the shop, but the wild foods, the garden, calves, and more neophyte homesteading tricks. With me now in the woods, I get to try things that I could never have dreamed of out on the wind swept prairie. I already have my eye, and my pestering of Husband, on one such project.