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Friday, November 16, 2012

Lalapalooza of one legged butchers

We had some guests over this week, all hankering to kill something and learn to dress it out. Luckily for me, I had a young Ram that needed to be placed in my freezer. Most of the men over were hunters, however one of them needed a bit more fish in a barrel type hunt. And we were happy to accommodate.

Earlier this year, a new to us friend, had been diagnosed with a rare cancer in the bone of his right leg. He was given options, but the Doctors were unsure how the treatments would work, his best bet was amputation. And he said make it so. He seems to be a decent fellow, ornery but who among us isn't?

As I attempted to navigate a way out of my home, the men were attempting to round up the sheep. I have learned something from watching this, just because you're a hunter doesn't mean you know squat about domestic butchering. Oh and crutches can be dangerous once emerged in cow patties. Just an FYI if you ever find yourself in a one legged sheep chasing experience.

Husband, as he walks faster than me, went out into the field to help these five men locate the pre-approved ram. Husband doesn't hunt. He never has gone on a hunting trip, he knows domestic fish in a barrel hunting. He is a natural at it.

He walks out into the field, the other men have the sheep scattered, a melee of comedy. With folgers can in hand, husband had the sheep lined up and following him to a corral. As the sheep cautiously followed Husband, they would leap four feet off the ground as they walked past the men. They had never attempted to shoot something that can jump six feet straight up in the air, let alone something that slowly walks toward them and leaps in the manner. They were impressed.

Once in the barn, Husband and another man allowed all but the ram to spook and escape. The ram leapt into the air and head butted the other man straight in the chest. As they both started to fall over the man had the presence of mind to slip the rope over the ram's horns. Husband ran around to the other side and held the sheep.

Here is where I renew my impression that my Husband is insane. Oh, but I still love him. He grabs the ram by the horns and waits. Let the lalapalooza begin!

Our one legged friend takes a shot with our old school single shot pump action .22 rifle perfectly between the eyes. I had to move, so didn't see the kill, as my paranoia out weighs my Husband's and I had no want to be standing in the line of ricochet fire.

Then the two of us raced on our crutches to the hanging tree. He won, only because he has been on crutches longer than I.

Field dressing an animal is different than commercial dressing. My understanding was that they were there to learn the commercial way. My old farm hand was one of the men. He was determined to field dress. After I caused a bit of blushing, we came to an understanding.

Sheep dressing is the same as goat dressing. If you want the nitty gritty of dressing them out, my post How to butcher your meat goat .

As a woman surrounded by eager to learn, drinking, ornery men, one must be prepared for the uncouth comments about the anus cutting out part of the program. It's a world of twelve year old boys out there people.

Things went smoothly, until Husband brought out my knife to use instead of the duller one they were using. As soon as I heard the tell tale , pooft, I told him quickly to stop being nice about it, and cut it open very quickly. Oh the guts exploding onto the ground seemed a bit much for the guys. Nervous laughter erupted. I could only shake my head, hunters.

It was relatively uneventful. There are a couple of photos on phones out there with two gimpy individuals skinning a sheep. It will probably end up a decently funny meme on tumblr.

Once halved, and put away to rest for a couple of days, we went inside to discuss war wounds. We are still not sure whose is better.


small farm girl said...

That sounds like a day around here. Well, other than the one legged thing. Just give me time, that could happen.

Phelan said...

I would take that back and knock on wood if I were you. ;)

Amy Dingmann said...

You are hilarious and I completely love your blog. I can only imagine the insanity of your one-legged butchering experience. You deserve an award. ;)

HermitJim said...

Nothing like a teaching day on the homestead! Guess that fun was had by all!

Anonymous said...

I would've loved to be there. And full-grown men are so much worse than 12 year old boys...

Phelan said...

Ha! Well thank you mama tea!

Jim, indeed it was.

Ruth, hahaha! Yep.

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