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Wednesday, August 23, 2006

You Reek!

I know of farmers that stink. I run into one or two of them every month when I go into town. They usually smell of alfalfa and horse manure. A common smell in Kansas after a rain. But this isn't about them, this is a completely self centered blog and I must talk about myself.

The other day I took my oldest son into the city, he was in desperate need of shoes. I showered and changed {clean clothes} and we went to a shoe store. I knelt down to see where his toes were in a certain pair, when I smelled something very unappealing. Sigh I reek! Of course there was no way I was going to smell of sweet alfalfa, as we don't have that much growing, I smelled of onions and bacon and dirt. It's at this point where I realize that the under paid teenagers weren't turning there noses up at me because they were snobs, no....I stink.

It makes me worry about what my son smells like when he goes to school. Does he smell like what I had canned the day before?

There needs to be a disclaimer, or warning in the homesteading books. You'll smell like what you do. ALWAYS!

I should have known this, as my husband smells like gasoline and used oil when he comes home from work. It's not as bad now that he works {builds} motorcycles, as it was when he worked on cars. But the smell is there, lingering.

Speaking of smells...I did discover that the smell of gasoline on a woman is an aphrodisiac to some men. Grocery shopping earlier this month, I had to get gas for the mowers. The smell was all over my hands. As I walked around, gathering my essentials, men kept smiling at me, saying hi, nodding. I thought...are my panties showing, do I have a nipple poking out? Everything was were it should be, but why were all these men flirting with me?

Gasoline and breasts, a good combination. Onions and bacon, bad combination.


Bug said...

I had that problem when I worked in a coffee shop, smelled like Joe made me sick sometiems. I wonder what I smell like now since I work on the internet *chuckle*

Cheryl said...

Thanks a lot Phelan, I just spat tea all over my laptop!!

Michelle said...

Speaking of coffee . . . I have friends who make a soap with tea-tree oil and coffee grinds that seriously kills the smell of just about anything. It ain't cheap but it sure works. They're really cool people, too. So yeah it's a plug, but I don't have any commercial interest . . . I just know it makes my husband stop smelling like a garage.

(you have to scroll down to it . . .)

I smell like garlic and onions a lot too! It's okay, yer still smart and pretty.


Phelan said...

Bug, the smell of over heating?

Cheryl, sorry.

Michelle, ~blush~ I'm book marking that site. Very cool. Christmas is coming, someone else is going to get some soap. There are those out there that smell worse than me.

alrescate said...

"Christmas is coming, someone else is going to get some soap. There are those out there that smell worse than me."

Note to self: Pray Phelan doesn't give you soap for Christmas.


I often have a similar seems like oders cling to my thick head of hair. There's nothing more annoying than going out into the world & then realizing you smell like bacon.

MissTree said...


So I guess I smell like books?

the Laughorist said...

Saw your comment about writing on Flip This Body's blog (Julie). I'm in my 50s and have sort of given up the dream of a novel (too much ADHD challenge) (well, a novel never was my dream, actually), but I can't tell you how pleased I was with some short stories I recently submitted. Pleased myself. Of course I'd love for them to get published but it was great to have a fellow writer read one and love it too. Can't beat that.

Phelan said...

alrescate, you smell just dandy. If I could figure out this corn nut thing...

misstree, new books or old?

the Laughorist, SO glad to hear a fellow writter has got someones attention. I know how hard that is. Keeping ym fingers crossed for you.

lisa said...

HAHA! Love this post...personally I think bacon and onions smell terrific-you'd be really popular up here in Wisconsin! The aroma of bacon, especially, is said to cause bears to try and enter the house (not happened to me yet). For me, "essence of beer" drives the boys wild! ;)

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