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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Soul Ties

One thing that I do not discuss, or rarely bring to your attention, is religion. I have my reasons for not discussing such things here.

Many of us move onto our land with a strict belief system, and that faith is quickly pushed to it's limits, tested for strength, and attempt to curl up on its side and die. So many thing can be harsh when you work with the land, your hands, and your family. You work outside in below zero F temperatures for hours at a time, you lose beloved animals. You wade through snow, mud and floods. You fight fires, birds of prey, and 4 legged predators {occasionally a two legged one comes knocking}. Some mornings you wake up, done with it all, and all of it questions and strains your faith.

Those of you that have read me from the beginning, know that I am not Christian. However I do not discuss what I am here because I do not wish to make anyone feel like they would not be welcome. Have you seen my sidebar? I have so many different people that I read and consider my community. I realize many of you will be more than just a little curious, but here is the thing, my belief sends both pagans and Christians into an uproar.

And that brings me to why I am even writing all of this. Before I go further I want every one to be clear, to understand that because I am about to do something doesn't mean I want any of you to disappear, or feel as though I am mocking your faith. Nor because I chose to do a certain ritual that I do not value other's.

Some of my long time readers and friends have caught on by now that I am babbling, and truly at a loss for words {I hear the giggling} It isn't about the fear of offending anyone. I live by the mantra that Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me. I tend to speak without thinking. All the while realizing that my mouth does tend to offend some people. I am actually taking a moment to think about this, about how to say it. But I guess I should spit it out.

On Thanksgiving Day until my birthday, 5 days, I will be preforming the Charismatic ritual of Soul Ties.

Why? Because I have issues. My issues affect not just me as a person, but how I handle situations on the homestead. I saw this post yesterday, and I made my decision.

Some will say, as some have already said, that it will not work if I am not a Christian. I have faith that it will work, I believe that it will.

What is it? Google search yielded many responses on what a soul tie is. Most of them where about not being a virgin before marriage. The writers of these articles want you to break those premarital bonds and that seems all they are willing to talk about. However I found an interesting article on Demon The only one to talk about Soul ties with objects, not just people. When you take on a vice, one or several of the deadly sins, or have sex and even marriage, you take a piece of that person or thing into you. Sometimes these are healthy, and sometimes they are not. I have many that are not.

What to do? On Thanksgiving day I will write my vices {i.e. smoking, sloth,} fears {rejection, not doing anything right} guilts, and so forth on a 2 inch piece of fabric. On the back side I will write what I wish to replace it with {depression is replaced with joy}. This fabric will then be pinned to my underwear. {I told my husband, who will be holding me accountable for my soul ties, that I might need bigger panties}. I will wear them everyday and night, only removing them to shower, for 5 days. On Thanksgiving day I will start my fast of not reading books. Believe me when I say this will be painful, as I read to escape from uncomfortable situations. The day after I have decided to add a solid food fast for the remaining four days. {grumpy will need to be on that list as well} I took some time to decide on that.

The point of this is to physically feel the pain that your vices and fear {sins} are causing you emotionally.

After the five days, I will burn each piece of cloth, riding myself of them. Reminding myself that I can take control of my life.

Now to explain to the in-laws why I am suddenly all lumpy.


Mysti said...

As one of the Pagan readers of your blog, I am not in an uproar over your post.. in any way, shape or form. In fact, I found this process fascinating because in a lot of ways it's a form of magic.

This time of year, we try and rid our lives of the things we no longer want and replace them with the positive we want to bring in. This can be writing what we no longer need (fear, anger, smoking, etc) onto a piece of paper, and ritually burning it as a form of release.

This is the dark time of the year in which we rest (internally and mentally.. though not so much physically) to renew ourself for the new year. It's a time of contemplation.

We are all different in our beliefs, obviously. This is something that I truly appreciate you for. That despite what your personal beliefs may be, you read my blog, post thoughtful and understanding comments, and don't judge.

You get down on yourself a wee bit to much.. heck, I guess we all do. We all want something better for ourselves.

What you don't find within, you will never find without.


Phelan said...

The mention of uproar was more about my relgious being rather then the post in general.

And yes, I do know that many different faiths have a similar ritual, I choose this certain one for personal reason. None having to do with my mother :D

Over the course of my life I have been or studied many, many faiths. I have practiced wicca and a few other "pagan" faiths, as well as Christian based ones. Although I will not name my faith here because of misconceptions and the fact...well as I said both groups get on me about it. And it has nothing to do with "black" magic or Satan. {just want to be clear on that before someone starts ranting about how evil I am ;)

Being down on myself is one of the issues I will be ridding myself of.

Mysti said...

Yeah.. I went and reread the post and realized that's not what you said. :) Maybe I should make sure i'm complete on my coffee intake before commenting.

And talk about misconceptions! Know all about 'em.. yet I still put myself out there, to an extent, which may be stupid on my part.. however, i'm big on being "who you are" no matter. Smacks of non-conformity.. LOL

Glad to know you are going to get rid of being down on yourself. You are such a brilliant person and don't deserve such criticism.. especially from yourself. More hugs!

Given55 said...

Great post, my dear child. Purity of mind, body & spirit is a humble goal. I support your decision and will be by your side. Freedom will be your victory cry.

Phelan said...

Mysti, misconception are abuntant on all sides of it. An unfortunate reality of religions. I see it as we are all moving toard the same goal, happiness, life, love and to be loved. Of course saying that I know that some people will see that statement as "evil" because of some strict learnings. And that comes from many sides, not just one faith.

I don't talk about faith, not because I am afraid to put it out there, but because I don't want my homesteading blog to be taken over by my faith, not just me talking about it, but other's obbsessing over it. I don't want strife in something that I want to bring me enjoyment. Writing, and reading all the blogs I do. I adore everyone listed on my sidebar, and do not want something like this to interfer, if you will. I am glad you put yourself out there, just like I am glad my mother {a supernatural christian} does the same.

Phelan said...

given, and a great cry it shall be. And hey! Is that the photo I took on your icon?

Faren said...

Phelan, I don't talk about my faith for basically the same reason. I don't want to alienate any people I know in real life. Which is sad, who knows how many like minded people I would meet if I wasn't afraid to put myself out there? Your soul ties ceremony sounds very interesting, I wish you luck and joy with it. This post brought up some interesting points in my life. Thanks

Stephanie said...

Hmm I always asumed your were an atheist. Not exactly sure why now that I try to pinpoint it, but. . .

Anyway "soul ties" are certainly something I've had to deal with, and still do to a certain extent. For me it has been a process that has involved letting go of trying to control my life. (in the spiritual and soulish realm I know that is kind of confusing when I want to be self sufficient. Hope it doesn't seem contradictory to you.)

I hope you can find freedom from the hurts of the past.

Anonymous said...

Hi Phelan. I too am neither christian nor pagan, though I have practiced both in my lifetime. I do have my own set of beliefs and spirituality but like you, I don't want it to become a focus for my blog (by others, really) so I stay clear of the issue. I hope you get everthing you need from your ritual. Cleansing, healing, all sounds good to me!! :)

Karen said...

I have always believed that there are many paths to God because there are many different types of people.

I like the concept you will be working with, and I've seen it in several different forms. I hope it brings you what you need.

And use Safety pins.

alrescate said...

Are you giving up cigs and reading during the same week? If so I'm happy I'm not living with you. *grin*

I think this is an excellent matters not if it is tied to any religion or not. Casting away fears, vices and other emotional or physical burdens is what is important. (More important perhaps is the mindful determination to replace them with good/positive things.)

Good luck to you.

Wendy said...

Seems to me what you're contemplating is very spiritual, and spirituality always transcends religion anyway. In his book "Ishmael", Danial Quinn touches a bit on the subject. We are all "spiritual" beings, but religion was created by man for man as a way of controlling other men (and women :).

I'm not religious, at all, although I am very spiritual and I talk to faeries (earth spirits) or god or goddess or whomever. It's not something I talk about a lot on my blog or even to other people.

I don't like having to defend myself, but you seem to indicate that you know all about that :).

I've always been inspired by your stories. From things you've posted, I know that you're not very old, in years, but you do seem to have a lot of wisdom for one who hasn't been long on this earth ;).

Good luck on your journey.

Carla said...

Fascinating. This is the first that I've heard of soul ties. I think rituals are extremely important and serve a purpose...even if it's only to keep our goals in the forefront of our mind. I might just have to give this one a try. Thanks for sharing.

Phelan said...

Faren, glad to see you! and thank you, you know you are welcome to join me.

Stephanie, Maybe it is because the only time I have mentioned religion was while talking about NAIS, and the mark of the beast, stating that I was not Christian, but not going into more detail. ?? No, it doesn't confuse me. Many faiths ask you to turn control over to your "higher power" {can you tell I have been to a NA meeting? ;)

Farm mom, I know how you feel and thank you.

Karen, haha I will! But as "safe" as they are, they do tend to pop open, and I do sleep on my belly.

alrescate, smokes, books and eating! no one will want to be around me then. thank you.

Caral, I too hadn't heard of it until given spoke of it. I have convienced her to do a more detailed or defining post. Please let me know when and if you do, do this. I would love to hear how it oes for you.

Faren said...

Yeah, I'm a bad commenter, aren't I? I am always reading though, you can count on that.
Join you in what? I don't think my brain is tracking very well right now, sorry.

Phelan said...

nevermind Faren. Sometimes I will be reponding to comments and my impatience to not wait until all the icons have loaded can cause problems. The screen jumps and I must have combined your comment with someone elses.

vonne said...

Ummm... one small question..
Is that a different pair of panties every day... or the same pair for 5 days? I think we need to be clear about this... heh

When I was young, I would complain about things that i wished I could change about myself to my mama, and she'd say "Write it on the wind, baby girl, and let it blow away..."
The first thing I did when I was diagnosed with the Big C, was right it on the wind.
It worked for me. :)

Anonymous said...

Good luck!! Hope it works for you.

Kate (Brisbane, Australia)

Phelan said...

vonne, I remeber a girl scout song, well parts of it got myself a pair of combination underwear. Wore them fifty days, without hesitation. Couldn't get them off, cuz I lost the combination I so hope that I am able to change them. That would be a whole new level to the uncomfortablness factor.

Thank you Kate.

Gina said...

Very interesting topic and responses!

I guess I label myself "pagan" for want of a better word. I think it is to mainly set myself apart from the Abrahamic (yikes, I hope i spelled that right) religions. I do try to be respectful and understanding of others' beliefs no matter how different they are from my own. (Although, I have gotton grouchy of having to "hide" my own beliefs in order to keep one-sided religious discussions at bay-I'm thinking about my ultra-Christian office mate and his assumtion that everyone is a Christian.)

I tend to blend together a lot of philosophies and theology-both traditional and neolithic-in my spiritual beliefs.

I can say without hesitation, I am Earth-centred and any aspect of other religious belief that have elements (cen be interpreted as such) appeal to me.

I have never heard of Soul Ties but it sounds like something I'd like to read up on. Thanks for sharing and opening up a discussion (even if it was not your primary intention, LOL!!!).

Lots of strength to you in your spiritual quest.

Phelan said...

Gina, the responses I have been getting our indeed good ones. I was a little worried about what some would say. I understand all too well about feeling the need to keep certain things to yourself. And thank you.

farmer, vet and feeder of all animals said...

Good luck Phelan:
If you stick with it only for the five days---then you are better off than you were before. right?
Good luck on making it longer than 5 days though.
There are no rules in exactly how we "break" ourselves of bad habits, fears, issues----no matter what our religion is. To each his own :-)

Faren said...

Oh, alrighty then! I understand.

Howling Hill said...

I completely cannot participate in this: I don't wear underwear.

But it sounds awesome!

(Do I say "good luck"?)

Phelan said...

howling hill ~giggle~ DO I say TMI? ;)

Howling Hill said...

Phelan: I think of it as less waste. Less material is wasted, less water to clean them, less cleaner in the washing machine...

lisa said...

This is an inspiring and cool idea...thank you and good luck! I think I could benefit from a journey like this...

Gemini said...

I belong to a very strict/conservative Christian denomination. But my mother and my grandma (and now I) don't fit too well with the others of our faith. My grandma believed (when she was alive) in astrology, fairies, mediums, etc. My mother believe in similar things, although not the same ones. Hers are more things like affirmations, nature spirits, communing with the dead (not through mediums, but just on your own). And then there's me. I am fascinated by everything occult.

And I really like the whole "Soul Ties" thing. What you have decided to do fascinates me and I think I'd like to do something like that sometime. And of course tailor it so my particular self.

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